The ISMS
Short and Sweet!

The ISMS, political systems of government based on particular beliefs, are difficult to understand and perhaps are better understood if we speak of them in terms of cows.



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Quotable Isms

My father used to quote these, and I am uncertain as to their origin. However, there was such a fight over these ideas and ideals, particularly surrounding the wars involving the U.S.A., that simplifying their meaning was a marvelously useful concept.

Most everyone knows what a cow is, and the usefulness of a cow. This was particularly true in the farming era prior to the technological age.

Following then are the simple definitions of the common political systems of the day:


Socialism

You have two cows and give one to your neighbor.

Communism

The Government takes both your cows and gives you some of the milk.

New Dealism

You shoot one cow, milk the other, and pour the milk down the sink.

Capitalism

You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.

Hitlerism

The Government shoots you and takes both cows.

Anarchism

You keep both cows, shoot the Government and steal another cow!



The above rendition brought lots of laughs and knowing glances from people wherever it was told.

If you think about it, it does tend to sum up each of these systems in a short, curt one-liner.

If you are younger, try reading this to your parents or grandparents and watch their reaction!


Star Spangled Banner Parody


Go from Isms to World's Longest Ism

Socialism Quotes

Funny Communism Quotes

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